There’s a great programme on the Discovery Channel, it’s called World’s Manliest Bear Attacks and Explosions Later on After The Original Bear Attacks. What you get is one explosive bastard of a ten-second, slow-motion dramatisation showing you how a bear once mauled a woman. It happened in the United States of America and this little dramatisation was so manly and awesome that they repeated it around fifty times over the course of an hour. Every five minutes the voiceover guy reminded you what had just happened in the previous five minutes, just in case Michael Noonan’s wife was watching.
The macho-science guys caught a huge bear and blew it up so you could see what it’s like when a bear gets blown up. Next week they’re going to be testing what happens when lots of people pile into a car and drive recklessly on small country roads.
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