Three Hours and Forty Minutes

August 8, 2009 By 4 Comments

Theres something nice about traveling on a bus in the off peak hours when there is fresh air and no stench of body odour. Enough space to be comfortable, and a big, albeit smudged window to peek out at the world from. Given the extortionate charges we are forced to pay to board a train, there are times when taken the bus seems like a better and cheaper option. More money for food and magazines, which is always an enticing prospect.

Dublin Bus Station is very small and is definitely in need of expansion, but things seem to run a lot smoother than Heuston Station. Cheaper sandwiches and friendlier pigeons. ( I see a lot of pigeons with missing toes, walking around on their little stumps. It’s a hard life on the streets).

pigeons 1 Three Hours and Forty Minutes

Dublin to Limerick is a journey of three hours and forty minutes, according to www.buseireann.ie. Given this long time period, it’s probably not a good idea to be glugging copious amounts of liquid unless you have very good urethral control, which I would like to think I have. But nevertheless, I always refrain from drinking too much. The scenario of having to ask the bus driver to stop so I can pee in the bushes, isn’t very appealing. [Read more...]

Filed Under: Crumbs Tagged With: , , ,

Irish Fail

April 16, 2009 By 8 Comments

Irish Rail Irish Fail

If you have ever had the misfortune to travel with Irish Rail then I sympathise with you.  I can guess that it was probably one of the most harrowing events in your life.  If not, then you’re a stronger person than most.  Like many  services in Ireland, you are charged through the nose for a pathetically inefficient and third-class experience.  I wonder if the monkeys in charge of Irish Rail even care at this stage that their service is a laughing stock.  I also pity visitors from countries such as Germany and France, for these people it must be like leaving behind regular steak dinners at home to come over here and eat slices of ham out of a bowl filled with pubic hair. [Read more...]

Filed Under: Ireland, News & Politics Tagged With: , , , , ,

Heuston Station, Dublin and the power of Piss

April 9, 2009 By Leave a Comment

I often dread when the time comes for me to take the train, not that there is anything wrong with trains per se, in fact I love their relative speediness and that you can eat and drink things without them falling off the table. It is the train station that I dread. Heuston station is very underwhelming, for the amount of activity and people that pass through, it is quite small. I don’t like the fact that I usually have to queue up at least an hour before my train leaves so I’m not the last one in a long snake of individuals trailing back to the entrance. Then there are the food outlets of which there is a staggeringly low choice, most people end up eating in Supermac’s since it’s about the cheapest option. I usually regret eating there about the same moment I feel a great heaviness in my stomach and a slight outer body experience owing to the large amount of over processed carbohydrates I’ve just eaten. To be fair to them they are a lot better than MacDonald’s, whose chips are suspiciously uniform with a faint taste of fish, and their burgers look like murdered squids with damp spots of perspiration. [Read more...]

Filed Under: Crumbs Tagged With: , , , , ,