Pat Spillane Should Put a Panini Up His Arse

Last night Pat Spillane spoke bravely on the Saturday Shite Show about a broken Ireland, a cold, unforgiving country in which old men in rural areas are forbidden to drink drive because of evil ‘urban-based legislation.’ I am in full agreement with Pat; this urban-based legislation is out of touch with the realities of rural life and should be resisted. There was a day when you could down fifteen pints of Guinness, drive home and fuck the wife against her will. But of course the pesky urban lawmakers came along and put a stop to spousal rape. As Sir Matthew Hale said in 1736, “The husband cannot be guilty of a rape committed by himself upon his lawful wife, for by their mutual consent and contract the wife hath given up herself in this kind unto her husband, which she cannot retract.” Wise words indeed, and food for thought in these increasingly politically correct times.

patspillane Pat Spillane Should Put a Panini Up His Arse

Taking away this right was bad enough, but to punish elderly rural men once again by not allowing them to drive home from the pub was a step too far. Most of these men are bachelors: they don’t even have wives to rape any more. Have some mercy on them. They come from a time when men were men. I sometimes think Ryan Tubridy is the last alpha male left in Ireland. Pat muses about the decline of rural communities, expertly weaving in words of wisdom from PJ Sheehan, a man also against the demonising of drink driving, so against it in fact that he called a young female Garda ‘sugar tits’ and vowed to have her killed if she made him get out of his car. Pat says that the bachelor farmers never leave their houses anymore, for fear of being caught driving home from the pub under the influence. How we can allow such reprehensible injustices persist in this country is beyond me and it makes me ashamed to be Irish.

Don’t get me wrong, legislation is capable of doing good. It is often welcome as a means of tackling evils such as drugs and blasphemy. But it should NEVER be used to inflict damage upon alcohol and our hard-won alcohol culture. Alcohol is NOT a drug and is an overwhelming positive in Irish society.

I Smoke Hash

If you mind on drive, you’re out of your drugs

drugs out of mind If you mind on drive, youre out of your drugs

They’re absolutely right. Don’t be driving while on drugs. Go for a nice drive, then pull over and do your drugs at the side of the road, you’ll enjoy them a lot more when you can relax and take your mind off the driving. Then walk home. Or just do the drugs in your house. Keep off the shitty roads. They’re lethal nowadays, what with all the teenage boys zooming about without a care for their own or anyone else’s safety.

Meth Ads

Came across these scaremongering anti-meth ads from America; maybe it’s just me, but I think they’re funny. Meth makes everything fun!

meth ads Meth Ads

Accordion Guy in the 21st Century

Champignon Magie

mushrooms Champignon MagieSo how long has it been since the magical mushrooms have been banned? I think it’s about three years, but I’m not sure. The whole debacle surrounding them still irritates me to this day. Only one drug is allowed total freedom to be consumed in this country, and that is good oul’ alcohol. I laughed to myself when it wasn’t touched in the budget. Of course not, but they will raise the price of cigarettes. Their reasoning is that they want to prevent people going over the border to purchase their tipple. It all comes down to money.
I hate when I see topical programmes discussing alcohol and drugs, alcohol is a drug! They usually have some nattering batty going on and on about the evils of drugs but she doesn’t mind a bit of whisky herself-you can’t debate with people like that. Alcohol is just a drug that’s been normalised in society to such an extent that you will find people who drink excessively but then spit on those that decide to dabble in anything that can’t be drunk in pints and vomited up. [Read more...]