Head Like a Hole

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Ricky Groves Tells How Dieting and Deceit Tore His Marriage Apart

His wife Hannah Watermelon lost three stone – then dumped him: Now Ricky Groves tells how dieting and deceit tore their marriage apart

When it was revealed last week that former EastEnders stars Ricky Groves and Hannah Watermelon had split up over Christmas, it was clear that the general public didn’t give two shits.

It is four months since Hannah, the daughter of Minder star Dennis Watermelon, made headlines with her dramatic weight loss, shedding three stone and radically altering her image in the process.

hannah watermelon Ricky Groves Tells How Dieting and Deceit Tore His Marriage Apart

Hannah with Ricky in October last year at the Pride Of Britain Awards

Since then, much has been made of her transformation and Hannah has talked publicly and enthusiastically about the benefits of her new healthy lifestyle.

Ricky, however, has had a little more difficulty seeing the positive side. His wife’s drastic diet and exercise regime brought him nothing but misery, culminating on Christmas Day with the confession that, for her, their marriage was over.
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Mikey J

dead mans shoes Mikey J

King of Pop Death Scene


I don’t know which is more pathetic, the story itself, or the fact that news organisations now have Twitter correspondents. It is Sky News though.

Bid To Give Jackson The Nobel Peace Prize

Ruth Barnett, Twitter correspondent

Michael Jackson fans have launched a campaign calling for the superstar to be nominated for the Nobel Peace Prize.

The late star’s fans have flocked to sign online petitions supporting the move.

They say he should be honoured for his charity work and “lifelong dedication to the well being of humanity”.

The big group of stupid sheep flocked to sign online petitions, in between drinking their own tears and talking to Jesus.

However, nominations for the peace prize are not made according to public demand.

Former winners of the prize include Nelson Mandela, Al Gore and Josef Fritzl.

If Al Gore can get it, then why not Michael? He touched a lot of kids all over the world. He reached out his hand and touched them and made them come together, etc., etc.

A Famous Person Has Died

famous A Famous Person Has Died
John Campbell

Myleene, Myleene Go Away

myleene Myleene, Myleene Go Away

It would be easy to fill a post ten times as long as this on the subject of ‘celebrity’ overexposure. In my opinion it can become almost nauseating, seeing the same annoying faces over and over again, especially in Ireland. In this country we are harassed and harangued repeatedly by the irritating bod 300x256 Myleene, Myleene Go Awayfaces of the same small number of RTÉ presenters, rugby or GAA players, models, soapstars, etc. If you turn on any RTÉ chat-show, the guests will usually be other RTÉ personalities, plugging whatever it is they are doing at the moment.  A few days later the presenter/guest roles are reversed and you can watch the same shite interview all over again. As you read your newspaper,  on every second page, pompous Irish rugby players pose in tedious photo-ops, usually beside someone like Glenda Gilson or that other Irish model who always looks as if she has been crying, like William Shatner.

For me, the gold medal in annoying overexposure goes to Myleene Klass. I find her continued success more than baffling. She is bland, boring and not particularly intelligent. Her recent stint on Miss Naked Beauty with Gok Wan (Go Wank?) was the most irritating. Myleene, in full make-up, condescendingly comforted terrifying, shivering women in the nude as they stood degraded and humiliated in an empty swimming pool, moments after she had doused them with a huge hose, blasting them with enough water to disperse a twenty thousand-strong crowd of English football hooligans. [Read more...]