Dumb Media
A KINKY City banker paid two unwitting escort girls to help him commit suicide.
Married father-of-two Colin Birch, 44, hanged from a tree after tricking them into becoming his “executioners”.
Mr Birch who had just lost his high-flying job, died in a wood in Dartford, Kent.
The two escort girls had hurled insults at the top City banker as he stood with a noose around his neck – believing it was all part of an elaborate sex game.
Mr Birch had told them to meet him in a wood and pose as his executioners.
But he insisted he would wear a safety harness.
Marie Laurent and Alex Sturley, both 35, found him in the noose, standing on a wooden step.
They said they left him for a moment before returning to find he had jumped – and had no harness after all.
A police source told The Sun: “The girls believe they were used to help kill him without realising what they were doing. It was death by hooker.“
Hmmm was it really a police source?
“When the girls got there he was crying with the noose on and one of them kissed his tears.”
Ambassador complains to RTÉ over World Cup report
SENAN HOGAN, IRISH TIMESTHE SPANISH ambassador officially complained to RTÉ about a TV sports report during which Spanish people were branded as “idiots” on the day after they won the World Cup for the first time in their history.
The broadcaster also said it received three e-mails and a phone call from viewers about the “anti-Spanish” tone of the Nine O’ Clock News dispatch on celebrations in Barcelona, which is in the fiercely independent Catalan region.
During the report, soccer correspondent Tony O’Donoghue interviewed a woman, during a street party, who said: “I hate Spain. I am Catalan, not Spanish.”
O’Donoghue then asked: “Even after winning the World Cup?
She replied: “Spanish people is idiot!”
RTÉ said it took the official letter of complaint from Spanish ambassador, Dona Mercedes Rico, very seriously, and formally responded to it.
An RTÉ spokeswoman added: “Yes, I can confirm that we did receive a letter of complaint from the Spanish ambassador about a report that was broadcast on RTÉ News on Monday, 12th July, and we responded.
“We also received one phone call and three e-mails complaining about the report’s ‘anti-Spanish’ tone.”
Barcelona FC had six players on the starting 11 that eventually beat the Netherlands by 1-0 after extra time in Soccer City in Johannesburg on July 11th.
‘Gerry Ryan’ is top Google search
ALISON HEALYTHE DEATH of RTÉ broadcaster Gerry Ryan led to his name being the most searched item in Google in Ireland in the first six months of this year, according to the internet search engine.
In the weeks following his death in April, there was a 3,750 per cent increase in searches for “Gerry Ryan”. Overall, there was a 1,150 per cent increase in searches for his name during the six months.
Well, ‘according to the internet search engine’, it wasn’t the most searched term, but the fastest rising search term. Seems the journalist didn’t bother with the difference.
Almost all of the actual top search terms owe their place in the list to those dopey shitheads who don’t know how to use the address bar of their browsers.
Ferdinand said: “I know we can do it on Sunday. When I think of Germany, the 5-1 win in the Olympic Stadium always springs to my mind.
“I love that photo of the scoreboard. I have a copy at home.
“It was a brilliant moment. Such things stay with you for ever.”
Current acting skipper Steven Gerrard, Ashley Cole, Emile Heskey and Jamie Carragher are all survivors from that night.
Survivors from that night. Lordy.
Look at Jurgen Klinsmann’s gesture in that photo.
I don’t think Johnny G likes that sort of carry-on.
According to The Sun, beating Algeria, the 30th ranked team in the world, will be England’s finest hour.
ENGLAND fans will tonight call on Our Boys to produce their “finest hour” – just like Winston Churchill did with our forces on the eve of the Battle of Britain.
They will pray our World Cup stars, including Wayne Rooney, conquer Algeria – 70 years to the day since PM Churchill called for heroism in a wartime speech.
I wasn’t quite sure how to feel about paedophiles before watching Prime Time Investigates: Crimes Against Children the other night. Well, I thought they were basically a good bunch of lads. Thankfully, this programme’s use of menacing, ambient music throughout has set me straight. Now I know that they are bad.
I never imagined that child pornography was a bad thing, until I watched some pink-headed American guy explaining that it was.
Also, I never knew how they were managing to swap all these child abuse images, but Prime Time were on hand with some helpful diagrams.
The woman hating Daily Mail are presenting the photo of Catherine Zeta-Jones on the right as proof that she is ‘losing her looks.’ It looks suspiciously like it has been altered to me. The photo on the left is from another source and has her face at a slightly different angle.
To be fair to the DM, it purchased the photo as is. You can see this strange looking photo on the Landmark Media Press website:
Hmmm.
As David Brent said, make your own minds up. Leave me out of it.